Happy Unexpected Returns

I was thinking about it today that it has been almost 28 years since I wrapped up a semester in Reno before heading back to Las Vegas.  It was also when my grandfather Gilliam passed away.  My return home was a rerouting to a small community on North Dakota's Turtle Mountain Indian Reservation called St. John.  The only time I remembered being there before was 1984 for the town's 100th anniversary.

Why is this coming to mind now during the great self-quarantining?  Well... I am sitting in an airport getting ready to go back.  Right now I'm asking myself when the appropriate time to put a mask on is.  Only 3 airplane rides there and a long drive back.  Hoping to get back in time for my anniversary.

Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Bella: The Best Trouble We Ever Had

There is a vulnerability and a selflessness to being a good dog owner.  The last time I had been given responsibility of a dog was about 1983-84.  Max was a Great Dane and his death from parvovirus destroyed me as a kid.  Partially because I thought his getting into a stick of butter I dropped killed him.  Yes, the things that go through a 12 or 13 year old brain can be crazy.  My wife had a similar feeling but in a different way, her dog died in her arms as she waited in a vet's office.  Those things can scar you and make you not want to let another canine into your heart.

About 12 years ago, things changed.  I had a very odd scheduled shift that left the wife at home alone at night.  We decided to get David a dog for his 10th birthday.  I still remember buying a video camera just before we went shopping to record the occasion.  That tape is still in the recorder and I had plans to try to get it converted to digital for the future.  I don't know if I can now.  Anyhow, she sat between Kerry and David on the way home as we discussed names.  David didn't have any ideas, turned to his mother and asked, "What do you think?"  Kerry was really into the Twilight book series and told him she liked Bella.  And it was done.  We welcomed a little puggle named Bella home.

I suggest avoiding using cat laser pointers to play with your new puppies.  She loved it, but I think it may have led to her becoming the high energy dog she was.  Bella did her normal puppy teething and ruined several shoes and the dining room table chairs.  She learned that if she jumped high enough, she could get anything she wanted.  At one point, it was her dog food...which was a massive bag that she polished off.  The 2 bags of chocolate chips she downed made the wife believe we lost our dog but it was just one of many sleepless nights over things she'd ingest.  (Anti-fungal cream was just perplexing.)  Aside from that, she was a very smart dog.  But I would teasingly say that she was a good dog when she was tired or sleeping.

The addition of her "sister," Tulip, was meant to ease separation anxiety and balance things out.  It may have.  If anything, I think Bella taught Tulip some bad habits.  We recorded a few videos of their interactions.  Feel free to look for the Bella And Tulip Show on YouTube.  Part of that was because of their food obsession (seems to be a puggle thing) and sneakiness.  The two would do something I would call "parallel puggling" where they would nap parallel with each other all around the house.

We gave Bella a lot of massages after we brought her home to deal with some anxiousness.  She had a lot of trust in us.  Early mornings, she would spend what we would call "Mama Time" with Kerry by sitting on the edge of the bed with her and stare into her eyes while being pet.  Often, we would watch T.V. and she would hop up on the sofa and push her back into my wife's armpit to sit with us.  She would also run maniacally through the house doing laps when she got excited.  She would hop on my chest as I did workouts in the living room.  Imagine doing sit-ups or bench press with a dog on your chest.  She also had a weird love for my morning breath...nobody else, just mine.

We would have to "Bella-proof" the house before we leave to go anywhere.  Kitchen trash would have to be turned around, stuffed in and sometimes a weight put on top.  Doors to bathrooms would have to be shut.  Toilet paper rolls would have to be reversed, or we would find the paper winding down the hallway and under the dining table.  She was very ballsy.

2 years ago, she was diagnosed with a mast cell tumor on her left arm.  It was going to be biopsied but our doctor felt that it was a bigger risk to try removing it as it could aggravate it and spread since it seemed attached to either bone or muscle.  So she was put on a regime of Benadryl and acid reducer.  A round of steroids shrunk it down.

Last week, that tumor swelled up.  It started with a limp.  (Tulip started sympathy limping a day or two later.)  We took her into see the vet.  Another round of steroids and painkillers were the plan.  The limp got worse the next day as the whole leg started to swell up and wouldn't touch the ground as she walked.  I was in denial, thinking the steroids just hadn't kicked in yet.  It spread to her chest shortly afterward.  Fear was building in us as we knew this wasn't getting better.  Tulip kept wanting to check on Bella as she wasn't used to her laying down all the time.  The cry of pain as Tulip stepped on her leg several times would wake us from our numb thoughts.  We would spend Saturday and Sunday morning keeping Tulip away from her.

It was as we were watching church that I decided that we needed to know when the pain is too much for her.  A few searches really gave me some clarity and reading one to Kerry, she said, "Are you ready to take her in?"  We bawled.  I've cried more over this dog than the passing of any relative and feel like I have dishonored them.  She went peacefully and it will be a roller coaster of tears and sighs for a while.  The house is really quiet as Tulip is still looking around the house for her "sister."  We have started turning toilet paper rolls around, leaving doors open and leaving burritos unattended on tables.

I still get choked up talking about Bella.  Making your heart vulnerable is important in any relationship and I wouldn't be who I am without letting that little brown scamp into my life.  It's just going to take a long time to adjust.

2019 Additions And Projections

I has been a busy year.  So much so that you haven't seen much written here lately.  I would make a New Year's resolution to do more but I can't predict anything.  But I do expect more activity with new projects.

We don't do a lot of birthday or holiday gifts between the wife and myself.  Usually, we just buy things throughout the year.  We decided that our big purchases this year would be kind of like birthday gifts.

Our second year visiting the Utah town of Duck Creek we found ourselves signing papers on July 4th on a .67 acre parcel with intent to build on it.  I don't know if you know the area but it's a beautiful mountain location with wild turkeys and deer running around.  There are lakes, trails and lots of snow (well, seasonally... it's not far from Brian Head and Zion National Park.)  The lot is pretty much a bunch of overgrown grass and I forsee that there is going to be a bit of yard work over the next few years.  Here's a photo of us after we cleared a small spot and had a picnic lunch.

I think one of the most fun parts of picking up this piece of land is that we can put whatever we want there.  Currently, it's empty but I've been watching tons of cabin building videos, episodes of Barnwood Builders and Building Off The Grid-type shows.  The wife is probably getting sick of them.  It's exciting to me but I know that a lot of physical work and landscape design is in my future.  It could be a vacation home or retirement spot... who knows.  But, how to use it in the meantime.  That is a big question.  We resolved that with our next purchase.

We figure that you have to sleep somewhere while building and why not pick something up that doesn't have to stay year-round.  So, just around Kerry's birthday, we found a great deal on a 30 foot travel trailer.  We hit the road with it to test a few things out and now we are just waiting for spring.  Then we can start configuring a driveway and trailer pad.  Yes, I see a steep learning curve coming and I think that is why I am filling my head with all sorts of information that I might never use.  But... it's fun.

Otherwise, I am already excited about the new year and hope you have had some good fortune yourselves.  Other than that, there has been a lot of concerts and festivals that we've been attending.  Have a great year, my friends!

Podcast Post-Script

A few months ago, I decided to look and see how a few of the show links were holding up.  As anyone with a blog knows, anytime you put a link up, it is bound to get changed on you.  Well, what I found was sad.  Talking 80s Music is missing.  Any link to shows or interviews on the blog here are what they call dead links.  Talkshoe, which hosted the show, seems to have deleted all 5 years of content prior to becoming Ning.  Could it have been because of copyright issues?  Could it be that someone complained?  Could someone have notified me about this?  I don't expect to get an answer because my account there was also deleted.  Thankfully, I downloaded and burned all 208 episodes.  So, as upset as I can be about the situation, it has opened a window.

I've been thinking about taking the interviews and posting them to YouTube in video format.  This would be quite an undertaking but I think the time the artists gave up warrants it.  So, expect some information here during 2020.  If the project goes well...maybe a new interview or two may pop up there.  You never know. 

11 Years Of Bublé And Bliss

I don't know if it was anxious or nervous energy but, at 11pm on the day before my wedding to Kerry, I had to get out of the house.  We hadn't moved in together yet and I think I had too many thoughts running through my head...even though she had planned every detail.  She's amazing like that.

I decided to go to Wal-mart and burn some energy wandering around.  I threw some clothes on so I wouldn't join a future "people of Wal-mart" post.  The place was pretty empty.  Of course, I'd wind up in the music aisle.  It's just home to me or was back then before they made it a small nook in area surrounded by cables and TVs.

So much to look at, to hear the songs in my head as I look at a CD cover and question its value.  Maybe I was channeling early Marie Kondo.  Who knows?  I'm kind of funny when it comes to a few bands.  I have a few that I really like but am reluctant to buy an album for fear that they aren't as good as I think they may be or that I'll really like them.  Coldplay was one of those, Linkin Park another...and so was Michael Bublé.

I'd been hearing his songs for years and I loved Sinatra for Sinatra, Tony for being Tony and not so big a fan of covers of those songs.  But Bublé's originals like "Lost," "Everything" and "Home," kind of haunted me.  The songs drew me back but were they enough to make me want to buy a full album?  So when I saw a few of the Bublé CDs (3 in total) staring at me, I felt a moment of kismet.  I had to pick them up and wound up listening to them until I passed out.

I left one of the CDs in the car for the post-wedding drive to Teri and Lloyd's for the reception (which was outstanding) to listen to with the new Mrs. Hennessy.  She was hooked.  After we added it to her iPod, she would go back to it often, as would I.  I still catch her singing a few of his songs here and there at unusual moments.

Fast-forward 11 years... yeah, it doesn't seem like it can go that fast but it does.  (Hold your children close and sweetheart closer.)  Our anniversary falls on the same night as Michael Bublé playing in Las Vegas.  How could I not connect the dots there?  So, we are going to spend a day exploring and evening with some crooning.  Whether it was anxious or nervous energy, something special was coming that next morning and has changed the man I am.

Photos From The Oregon Coast

Rocking Out Behind The Keyboard

I've mentioned my history with music before this on the show as well as in print but sometimes your past comes back to bite you in the butt.  Ok, maybe...flick you on the ear.  These were good times.  I was a member of, Fak-Shen, a local band with a few songs on rotation locally and we had a nice following.  Someone out there probably even has a rare cassette from us.  Brian, Mike and myself had known each other as friends for years prior and were pre-AOL technophiles that would get together weekly.

Performing and setup can be a great test for an electronically structured group.  We had our mishaps like most bands.  Then there was a multimedia showcase called Mr. Bondi's Soundhouse held at Fremont Street Reggae & Blues that we were part of on Feb. 21, 1995.  The idea was that we'd play about 3 songs or so and they would film it.  So, what you see is a part of one of our songs with some playful editing by visual artist Anthony Bondi.  Definitely dark video for a not-so-upbeat song but understandably a reason for them to play with video effects.

I remember us getting a single copy of it later but have no idea who ended up with it or where it wound up.  So it was a welcome treat to see Mike send this to me this morning.  We can trick ourselves as we get older.  When you list your accomplishments, you may omit some things or embellish others.  Yet, sometimes it's just nice to have proof of your past.

Thank you, Gene

A few weeks ago, Kerry's uncle Gene passed away.  Services were held during the weekend.  Despite having other health concerns, it wasn't supposed to be a serious surgery that he went in for but, on his way to recovery, he departed.  I can't say I ever heard a mean-spirited word leave his mouth and he was very generous with his time.  We really are here to help each other on this temporary home and what kindness we show is our legacy.  Thank you Gene, for everything.

Donna Thoughts

My favorite people are the kind ones.  I used to always refer to my own grandmother Lillian as what led me to my wife.  Yesterday, Kerry's own grandmother Donna passed away.  She was always there with a smile on her face when you greeted her and was always looking for ways to do for others.  I'm happy that David got to spend a lot of time with her recently and know how important she was to him. I am a better person for having known her but it feels like there is one light out on a Las Vegas marquee that will never be replaced.  We love you.

Visiting Our Texas Family

I don't know if it has to do with security.  Strike that!  Of course it has to do with security.  It's like when people set a trap for a criminal and announce that they are leaving for the day, week or some undecided amount of time so someone can go violate your property.  So we don't tell people much about our vacations until after the fact.  Maybe I've just heard too many stories about houses being ransacked or parties being held after posting something on Facebook or someone saying there is a party at your address.  Thankfully, we had a house-sitter/dog-sitter while we were gone.  So now I can tell you a little about our getaway to the lonestar state.

I love seeing family.  I also like visiting a state that I haven't been to before.  So, to get both of those in on a trip, I'm already excited.  Sure, it was a little rainy flying into Austin but the weather was beautiful for the rest of the week.  First stop with Aunt Karen and Uncle Sonny was something called Whataburger.  I'd heard of it before and it had been on my mind.  You see, Las Vegas has been slowly getting these big burger chains coming to town after years of neglect.  White Castle, Smash Burger, Steak And Shake, Shake Shack, Bobby's Burger Palace... even Chick-fil-a are joining our desert cityscape.  So, it was very good.  I may have ate more than I should but I knew I wasn't going to get the chance to do it again for a very long time.

Next stop was a small town called Belton.  I would just call it a beautiful country estate.  Lots of trees, flowers, squirrels, cardinals, hawks, doves all enjoying nature.  The cardinals wouldn't stay still to get photographed.  Karen said it best, "The only difference between weeds and flowers is if you like them or not."  It's very true.  Lots of purple flowering "weeds" strewn amongst Indian paint brush/fire wheel flowers.  We brought some seeds back to try and plant the latter here at home.  Fingers crossed.


Added a few books to our collection, drank a little wine while couple painting and learned a game called Mexican Train.  Sure, the name sounds a bit racist but at some point everyone uses the train and gives it something.  I know there is a painfully drawn out analogy in there somewhere but I'm not going there.  What I do know is that I have to add it to my list of games that I'll sit back and watch or play once in a blue moon.  I came to the conclusion that adding up numbers isn't something I do for fun which leaves me out of a few card games as well.  Understanding what relaxes you and what doesn't is a good way to enjoy your vacation.

I couldn't leave out the graciousness of a man named George.  When he heard that we were coming into town, he told our family, "Bring them over to the party barn and we'll show them some Texas hospitality!"  That man held true to his word.  We were ushered into an amazing structure housing a huge bar, restaurant kitchen equipment and a lot of seating.  If there was a dart board set up, I would not have left of my own free will.  Great food, great friends and good times.  Somewhere in back was a huge garden as well as a chicken coop (with a huge rooster protecting his girls.)  It seems a lot of people have chickens out there.  (Here's a picture of Sonny and Karen's collection that gave us fresh eggs every morning.)  The man has a great eye for classic cars as well.

Never let time get the best of you.  I know, we all push things off.  You have a life ahead of you but, like me, I bet you've said, "I'll go visit (insert name) sometime."  Like good friends, family accepts that you have a life to live in your own wacky way and there is a feeling of reconnection that re-establishes itself seemlessly no matter how you spend the time you are together.  So, go find that time.  Life doesn't seem so short to the living but take advantage of it while you can and get together sooner than later.  We are better for it.  Karen, Sonny, Kendall, Adam, Luka and Sheila (all pictured except Adam) you gave us a great present with your time and I can't express how happy we were to spend our vacation with you.  We miss you already.

Team Identity

I always found it interesting when a new coach comes to a team and says, "We are working hard to build our team identity."  I was late coming to my passion for football and phrases like this always had me scratching my head.  Did they not have an identity, know who they were or decide to change their identity?  I can see how teams known for great defenses, especially given names like Purple People Eaters or Orange Crush, can see this as important.  But I also see a lot of similarities here with our political landscape.

As I said, I was late to football.  I became a little bit of a fan at the end of my high school years because I would see my stepfather screaming at the television during games and wanted to understand.  I would later find out that my father was a football fan but never really talked about it (usually putting a bet in on a game here and there.)  Of course, I would find this out after I had become a fan of his rival team.  Usually, those things are passed down though and changing would feel traitorous.  During these early days, a loss hit hard.  I remember being frustrated enough that I'd just want to curl up and sleep the feeling off.  Sure, it didn't help that it was a team that would have over a decade and a half of bad years to come but you stay with your team.  You actually identify yourself as a (insert team) fan and tell friends, "We lost a close one last week.  If only we could have got the ball to (insert playmaker.)"

So, why do I see a tie to politics here.  Well, there are isn't...well, not just one.  Let's start with identity and what team you are on.  Politics has become a team sport and, if you become active in it, you will have to pick a team (or two.)  A lot of those "teams" take a stance or allow another "team" to take a stance which places them on the other side of that issue.  So, your "team" may be for something but against others... kind of like a football team has a great running back but no quarterback to get the receivers the ball.  The defense may have holes here and there too.  Changing "teams" can easily brand you a traitor.  I was on one such "team" until a few years into college.  As a matter of fact, it could be said that I had another football team as a child because of a Vikings jacket that I was given for Christmas one year (and I have no idea who gave it to me) but never watched a game until years later.  Identity is important.  Isn't it funny how both major parties identify themselves with animal mascots like the elephant and the donkey.

I have never personally voted for anyone that won a presidential election.  It could be that I'm on a losing "team" or that I'm not a "team" player.  I believe the last few elections have also been about identity.  In 2008, I was asked in by a union leader what I thought of their choice to back Clinton or Obama.  I said that, at that time, there was a lot of baggage with the former.  That year was a record voter turn out and many said that they identified with the man because of his race and what having a black president would mean about our nation.  Opposing team differences with his policies were viewed as a problem with his being black.  A friend of mine told me that if a woman ever ran for president, she would vote for her.  A lot of women this year identified with Clinton.  It didn't help that her opponent put his foot in his mouth when talking about women or when old footage of him sharpened that view.  Ads pushed that image and were awarded with a few different reactions: fear, indifference, anger or a sense of over-reach.

Did identity politics affect the vote?  It speaks more to the post-election climate than votes.  The counties that flipped in key states like Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania that previously would have gone to her were struggling economically and are believed to see a continuation of current policies and new regulations on coal as unbearable.  My friend didn't vote for her despite her earlier resolve.  She believed that she wasn't the right person to represent the gender in the office for the first time due to ongoing legal issues.  Sometimes a coach isn't right for a team.  Sometimes changing coaches every year or two isn't the answer either.  You make a decision there based on the personnel you have or you keep your coach and change your personnel (which can take time.)  It is easier viewing this from the outside because, I said, my team has been bad enough not to make it to the big game for a very long time and my "team" isn't a major party.

Maybe these major "teams" need to build or change their identity.  (I wonder what the Green, Independent, Constitutional or Libertarian animal mascots would be.)  But, I guess, there will be plays in the future for the first Islamic president, first Hispanic president, first gender neutral president or first bisexual president as real issues get ignored.  There is despair out there.  Fear inspired by the ads during the election and mixed with a few organizers have brought some unrest on the streets.  Pain and division of those "teams" don't look to heal soon.  I can only hope that we can put something decent on the field.

Silver And Black Possibilities

I was going to go on a long diatribe about the history of the Raiders moving and the desire to have a stadium without a dirt in-field and unpainted concrete walls.  It just doesn't seem right.  What is weird is having a carrot dangled in front of you.  Just the idea of my team moving to my town is a bit crazy.  Think about it yourself for a moment.  Let's just say that your favorite team (which has a long history but problems with a current and foreseeable business dilemma) mentions where you live as a possible landing spot.  I admit to a lot of denial early on.  With the roller coaster the team has been on with moving, it would have been worse if I got excited about it.  But, I guess things are looking good.  We are hours away from the vote by the NFL owners on the relocation.

Having a good season made for an exciting year as a fan but also to see the excitement of my wife and son is priceless.  I even saw the Mrs. tear up when Derek Carr broke his leg.  Yet, it's even more interesting to see local football fans come to the realization that they could have games come to their town.  They could have something that brings the city together.  I have even heard several talk about a 'Las Vegas first' emotion taking over where they will always pull for a home team win despite being a Cowboys, Steelers or Packers fan.  Pretty crazy.  I guess, it will be an interesting day.  No matter how it goes, it is amazing that it has even become possibility.

Why, How And The Road Less Travelled

Heard of an interesting way to look things earlier today that is still rattling around in my brain.  Those that work for someone know "how."  Those they work for know "why."

Why something so simple runs around in my head, I don't know.  It could be my son's search for a job.  Sometime soon, he will be one of those that knows "how."  Think of all the job's you've had and what you learned there to carry out what was expected of you.  That's a lot of know how.  I still make pizza the same way I did at my first job and look at photos and lighting the same way I did when I worked in a photo lab.

And then there is the "why."  To get a job, you don't care about the "why" right away... you just want to get paid.  After you know the "how" sometimes you stray over and start asking the "why" but that starts encroaching in on the boss' territory.  Some focus so much on it that they start ignoring the "how."

Oddly enough, if you have a better answer to the "why" than the person you work for, you will move on and improve upon that model.  When a young Sam Walton had a better "why" than his boss James Cash Penney (yes, J.C. Penney), he built a better beast.  John Lasseter's better understanding of "why" than his Disney executive bosses took him on an amazing journey.  Lasseter was terminated from his job, he brought that "why" to Lucasfilm creating Pixar... and it would be acquired by Disney 22 years after his termination.

What does it all mean?  I see people often questioning the "why" of things while working on the "how" side of the business.  There are times that I do as well.  But, I also know that a "why" is often not worth voicing unless solicited.  Well, unless I have the next Walmart or Pixar on my hands.  Who knows?  Maybe my son will.

Month To Remember

Note to self: Today was a crazy day and caps off an unbelievable month.  So, let's say it here that October 2016 needs to be recognized here on out.  Martin, when you think something is impossible, that the burdens you carry are too heavy or that you aren't worthy of what you have because of your past...remember this month.

Some clarification for readers: I had two great conversations this month that have given me a missing puzzle piece.  Perspective is like that.  When you are missing it, you feel incomplete.  You are drawn to that spot.  You may even resume searching for the piece at strange moments.  So, I am sincerely thankful and humbled.  No more searching.

The Sky Was All Purple...

It is a classic line and yesterday it ran through a lot of brains.  How does one moment define you?  Although the song "1999" wasn't Prince's first hit, it was the first single associating him with the color purple.  Then "Purple Rain" came and reinforced it... along with a movie and some colorful pseudo-Victorian attire.  That moment in time associated the man with the color.  Very strange.

I was contacted yesterday and reminded that I would have been neck-deep in research and song selection for an episode of the show focused on 'the artist' if I was still doing the show.  I would have also been doing so for David Bowie a little bit ago.  I actually miss it and love the research as much as the presentation.

I guess, the hard part about defining ourselves by something, even for a short time, is that we can let ourselves become a template.  Kind of like cookie dough filling in the area of a cookie cutter, we will never be more than that shape until we ditch or change the cutter.  Ending the show was a moment to reclaim the rest of the dough.  Some artists do that to avoid being stereotyped (search MC Hammer Funky Headhunter for kicks) and, heck, a lot of people would like to confine an artist to being defined by one hit single.

Today is a day to remember that you are more than your public perception, definition, color or greatest achievement.  Unless, you happen to be happy with that.

BDC Release "Blow Me"

I was fortunate enough to interview Nick Richards of Boys Don't Cry a few years ago and got to hear an early demo of a few of their new recordings.  Well, one song called "Blow Me" is now being released as a single via iTunes.  It's fun, funky and a little brash.  I personally love the little keyboard bits here and there and tension it adds to a fun song.  I'd urge you to pick it up but, heck, why not hear it first?

Distance And The Eye Of The Hurricane

It intrigues me the perspective we gain when we are far enough removed from something.  Time is the distance that I found helped me understand a few things.  You see, as happily married as I am now, I believed that I was very shortly happily married at one time.  The big point is that the lessons you learn or didn't learn from your first car will make an impact on your current vehicle.  The habit formed from riding the gas level to its lowest point could cause problems in a newer vehicle that creates vapor lock.  So, something clicked with the past recently and I thought I'd use my regular vague way of expressing it.

At that point of previous happiness, I was really unaware of how unhappy she was.  The first hints were her wanting to take jobs in other states and later telling me that, when we were next to each other, everything is great but when we are apart -- she was unhappy.  I asked about therapy but that was turned down.  After asking for a separation and later an exit, I would look back thinking that maybe postpartum depression was involved.

During the last few years, I've regained my physical health.  I have a rather physically demanding job.  I had a moment of clarity recently when I started thinking about my previous physical well-being.  I had an earlier workday.  I would come home sore and tired.  I was popping ibuprofen and wrapping my wrists/ankles because of what I believed (and was told by doctors) were strains.  I gained weight.  My blood pressure went up.  I was chronically tired and also slept a lot more.  We stopped going out to do things.  Mentally, there were unresolved questions that I promised to brush aside for the stability of the relationship.  All these things have now made me think of one thing... I may have been going through depression.

Being in the moment, on the football field, you have only your vision around you, the sounds around you and your awareness.  Living is like that.  You are really in the eye of the hurricane and the ability to step back and review isn't often there.  Would things have been better if I stretched or exercised more back then?  Maybe.  Would things have been different if I got therapy?  It's very possible.  It took several years but I am in a much better place right now.  I forgive that younger me for being stuck in a moment and the ex for the direction things went.

All I know is that things seem more clear.  Now, it is all about how I put that knowledge to good use in the here and now as well as the future.  I am happier, healthier and hopefully a little more aware.  If this helps someone, I feel like I passed something on.

Life Update: 040214

Last month was pretty busy and it's a good time to wrap it up here.

We signed an offer on a home (still in Henderson) and should entirely be moved in by July 1.  A lot of work will be involved (with a month or more of projects before moving) but it just means all my viewing of DIY Network and HGTV will come to good use (and will probably include new ones to join my other TV show recordings.)

Moving is kind of like spring cleaning for pack rats.  So much so that you'd probably hear me squeak every time the family decides on what makes the cut and what goes to charity.  Books, DVDs, furniture... they will all go through some American Idol type of contest.  Which reminds me of that one series of posts I did years ago with my shirts here on the site.  Speaking of that, our first bags of clothes have been sent out.  I had 4 of those zip-lock type storage bags for clothes full of things Kerry had never seen before... some about 2 decades old.  I modeled the stuff and let her decide if she could bear seeing me in them.

Goals and attaining them, we finally reached the light at the end of the tunnel.  We've bee working with David on driving for quite some time.  First it was weekends in parking lots.  Then it was a few streets here and there.  During our summer trip, he drove a leg from Las Vegas to Baker.  David's next step was taking his driving test and, on top of a few other errors, one big one (in timing his entering into traffic) prevented them from passing him.  For the next few weeks, I had him drive to school with me while I drove the car back home.  Kerry would also take him out at night when she could.  He passed with a 95 on the last day of the month.  Yesterday was his first day driving to school without anyone in the care with him.  Ok, sure, I followed him... sue me.  He drove back home by himself.  Today he told me he was ready to go and I told him, "I think you are ready.  I'm not following you today."  He sent me a text when he arrived.

We've been pricing all the new appliances, tile and all sorts of things needed for the new house and the wife has been trying to calm me down.  I don't like numbers.  I really don't like numbers that have a real world meaning.  I like them even less when I start thinking, "Isn't someone giving something like this away on Craigslist or something?"

Kerry and I celebrated our 6th anniversary and decided to keep with our go to a different town each year trend with a trip to the Pahrump Winery and their Symphony restaurant.  Last time I was there was over 20 years ago.  The wine that is named for their restaurant was impressive as well as their red blend.  Wish I could have picked up a few bottles there but It looks like we will just have to make a return trip.  Kerry was pretty impressed with the food.  I was impressed with the company.  I am a lucky and blessed man that doesn't deserve to live this well.

Started a new workout called Focus T25 today.  I'm sure, once I adjust, I'll be alright but it's quite different from Les Mills Combat and I had a few shaky moments starting out.

Been doing some research on the Turtle Mountain Indian Reservation.  I really haven't talked about that part of the family here much but I am part Chippewa.  I think that I have visited there, at most, 3 times.  Once for St. John, North Dakota's 100th anniversary in 1982, once for grandpa's funeral and I believe once on a quick trip through on vacation (which could be confused with the first one as I was just about to turn 11.)  As one of the oldest structures in town, Grandpa's house has became a visitor's center.  I recently learned that he used to give out pennies during Halloween.  Well, you have to account for inflation but it was worth more back then.

Looks like we are going to be spending a lot of our vacation time this year working on the house.  We will still make it off to Sacramento and a few days in November for my brother's wedding.

Relocation Proposition

I know that I've been quiet.  After a lot of deep thought and meditation under a waterfall of red wine (ok, maybe not the latter,) we started looking at houses.  We started looking at houses.  I know people are struggling finding houses in this market but I really believe there is a reason for everything.  Less than a week after our first visits, we've signed paperwork.  Now it is just more paperwork, inspections and the financing gods.  Will know more soon.  If you remember the tiling job I did a few years back on the shower, I may be putting it to shame in the near future as there is purple carpet in most of the house.  Weird, I know.  I think it was to match their sofa and not a fetish for Barney.  Gotta run.  So much to do, so much on my mind and, yes, lots to look forward to.

Travel Tip #483

You have been busy with life.  Things get hectic but you still need to get some things done right or it will take more effort to fix it or you'll remain frustrated later.  That is where this tip comes in handy.

Guys.  If you are taking the girlfriend on a trip, you must book the room yourself.  Yes, this could be out of your comfort zone.  You may get yelled at for picking a lousy hotel, room or view but, trust me, you must do it.  Why?

Hotels have stepped up in the last dozen years.  The idea of customer service ranks high and to them that means familiarity.  So you will find you are asked for your name, called by that name and it will sound forced while it is repeated often.  Technology is amazing because they have your name in the computer once you book the room.  You use that name again when you check in.  So, they will repeat it thinking customer service wins over customers.  If the name is wrongly spelled, expect to hear it mispronounced often.

Ladies.  I will not leave you out.  If you really want to mess with your boyfriend, book the room yourself.  Why?  Because nothing upsets a guy more than being called Mr. (enter your last name) more than once per time you meet an employee.  He may even correct that one person but it will not be changed in the computer and he will get called that way again by the next one.  That could be about 8 times a day if you work it out right.

Guys.  If you are reading this too late, do not answer the door, phone or approach a desk of any type to avoid this issue.  My apologies if she read this first.